


Expanded Codex

by DaharMaster



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Codex Entries (Dragon Age), Gen, Humor, Thedas (Dragon Age)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-06-30 12:57:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19853647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaharMaster/pseuds/DaharMaster
Summary: An ongoing completely off the wall, seat of the pants, non-canonical, humorous expansion of the Codex for the Dragon Age games.





	1. Nugsacking: A Dust Town Tradition

_ An anonymous monograph, the edges nibbled upon, found on a dead dwarf in the Frostbacks reads as follows: _

Nugsacking is a time honored Orzammar tradition, believed to originate among the casteless of Dust Town. It is part practical joke, part skilled sport, and is now enjoyed by all castes.

The aim seems simple enough; fill a sack with the feistiest nugs one can find (a feat in and of itself) and toss it to the intended victim, spilling feisty nugs all over them.

However, this is much more complicated than it may seem. First one must acquire a sack’s worth of feisty nugs (now easily purchased from many such dealers), but then one must transport the sack, held shut by only a drawstring, to the location of the intended victim without the nugs escaping, and thus accidentally nugsacking oneself. This, of course, is no mean feat.

Upon arrival at the vicinity of the intended victim/recipient, one then must first declare in a loud clear voice, “Hot nugs!”

If this is not heard, any nugsacking that may follow is considered null and void. One then must carefully loosen the drawstring just enough so that upon impact, the sack will open, but will continue to contain the nugs up until that point. This is a skill that requires a great deal of practice as one must estimate the distance of travel, force of impact, and feistiness of said nugs.

Once the drawstring is adequately loosened, one then must make eye contact with the intended victim/recipient. In some quarters this is considered optional, but many now view this as a necessary part of nugsacking.

Now comes the actual action. The sack of feisty nugs is hurled to the intended victim/recipient who is honorbound to at least attempt to catch the sack. Any who shirk this duty or recoil are branded “nugless” and barred from instigating any nugsacking of their own until they have properly caught a nugsack.

This is where the skill and sport come into play as there are one of three possible outcomes. Should the nugsacker have loosened the drawstring too much, when they attempt to hurl the nugsack, the nugs will immediately spill out and they will again have ostensibly nugsacked themselves. If the drawstring was not loosened enough, the intended victim/recipient may then choose to loosen it further and toss it back, reversing the nugsacking.

The intended and desired outcome, however, is that when the intended victim/recipient catches the nugsack, the feisty nugs spill forth all over them, likely nipping and doing all manner of unfortunate things to the individual before dispersing.

As you can clearly see, there is statistically a far greater chance for the nugsacker to either be reverse-nugsacked or accidentally nugsack themselves than for it to happen to the intended victim/recipient. Hence a successful nugsacking is seen as a great achievement, one of great skill and bravery, and in many ways being the victim of a successful nugsacking is in itself an honor.

Finally, the instigator of the nugsacking, regardless of the eventual outcome, typically pays the owner or proprietor of whatever property this has occurred in a sum of twenty-eight bits, the standard fee of a nug catcher to deal with the new infestation.

Many nug catchers have also become nugsack dealers and it is said in hushed whispers by some that at least one or two have trained their feisty nugs to return to them upon escaping from the sack, making the process all the more efficient and lucrative.

_ A seemingly comedic albeit crude depiction of Bhelen Aeducan nugsacking Lord Harrowmont follows. _


	2. The Bartol-Tethras Beet Plantation

How precisely House Tethras and Comte Jerand Bartol came to do business together is a ripe subject for gossip among approximately two individuals, neither of whom unfortunately know each other. Regardless, it is still a mystery.

Comte Bartol is by all accounts “excruciatingly eccentric” with fascination, bordering upon obsession, with all things he perceives as exotic. Such things include Frostback Geese, famine, Vyrantium pickled herring, the word ‘mirage’, and of course beets, and Rivain.

His lifelong quest for the “exotic” has rather impacted his family’s finances, as one might imagine, however, and this is the presumed reason that when his last supplier of Rivaini beets stopped returning his letters or doing business with him and he had the “marvelous” idea of becoming his own supplier, he needed a business partner.

The rest is up to speculation, but House Tethras became that business partner, namely as an investor as the comte was quite taken with the idea of running the plantation himself.

Since its establishment just outside Dairsmuid, the plantation has caused quite a stir among local farmers. At first, the comte refused to hire any local labor, preferring instead to import labor all the way from the Free Marches (why not Orlais, given that the comte is of course Orlesian, none are sure) in the form of nothing but similar looking men all named Clyde. Again, speculation abounds.

When this proved too costly and Bartrand was forced to send threatening letters (and Varric may have sent a single crossbow bolt inscribed with the phrase ‘do better’, though this cannot be verified), the comte finally began using much cheaper and far more knowledgeable local labor. Although, it must be said, to this day he still refers to everyone on the plantation by the name Clyde.

His second son, Blanchard Jerand, has speculated this is so he doesn’t have to remember the actual names of so many individuals, but no one knows for sure.


End file.
